Black Lace review : Wally’s or geniuses?

Originally published on Dooyoo.co.uk

Once voted wally act of the year by the music press, it seems that few dare to praise them. There are even sites claiming Agadoo is the worst song in the world. Black Lace don’t take themselves too seriously though, they don’t even shy away from telling everyone on their official web site about the wally act of the year award. Their home page proudly announces, “This is Black Lace, a legend in their own lunch box!”

“Aaaa gaa, doo doo dooo push pineapple shake the tree” OK I’ll stop, but only if you admit that Aggadoo is quite possibly the catchiest party-pop song ever to be recorded. It’s in your head right now. I know you might not want it there, you may even hate it being there, but that’s the point. It’s such a catchy tune that it is futile to resist.

The only hope is to displace it with something else. What about Superman? Go on, indulge, “sooopermaaann.” Then there’s Music Man.” I am the music man, I come from down our way and I can playay – I can playay. I play piano. Pian pian pian-oh – pian-oh, pian-oh.. pian pian pian-oh.”

Hang on a minute my tongue has started aching. Let me take it out of my cheek and place it back in the default position where it’s more comfortable. I can’t help but respect Black Lace though, for dominating their chosen musical field, and it’s about time someone raised their head above the parapet and said so.

If truth be told I’m more of a prog rock fan but but I have to admire what they’ve achieved. Ask any DJ (who does weddings and parties) which cd they have in that box they carry with them to every gig. The one that says, “to be opened in case of emergency”. Yes it’s Black Lace.

When the dance floor is a heaving throng of sweaty dancers, all is right with the world and everyone is happy, at the end of each song there comes that tense moment when dancing falters and people strain to recognize and approve the next song. If all goes well this pause is momentary, seamless in fact. If not – disaster. People stream back to their seats as if some pungent smell had been let loose amongst them.

The DJ panics. “Hang on a minute,” he pleads but no one hears. However, the well prepared, experienced DJ, will have had his hand poised on Agadoo all the time and before you can say, “This’ll teach ‘em,” – quick as a flash he will have regained control.

I have witnessed it so many times that I am now a believer, yes I believe. I have never seen any song so guaranteed to have people flocking to the dance floor as Agaddo, Superman, or Music Man by Black Lace. It has to be said though that this method will only work if over 80% of the audience is drunk. I once heard of a DJ who played Agadoo when it was only himself that was drunk. He hasn’t worked since.

My point is that music takes many forms, and there is room for them all. Live and let live. Some music is designed purely and simply to dance frivolously to at parties, never to be listened to alone (you have been warned) and not to be taken too seriously. Black Lace are masters of this genre and as such deserve some respect.

They’ve had about a dozen hits between 1979 and 1996 and released nine party albums. If you feel like a quick refresher course on the dance moves to Agadoo this little animation with the music might tickle your fancy.

Do the Agadoo dance

If you can’t see where I’m coming from, no problem. I admire your ability to resist such catchy tunes. But wouldn’t the world be a better place for our children if we lived in a society where one could dance openly and with a temporary disregard for one’s own dignity, without fear of retribution?